Nuke Mecca???

Speaking of "battle-hardened soldiers for Christ," I came across this little tidbit today.

"Has the US threatened to vaporize Mecca? Intelligence expert says nuke option is reason bin Laden has been quiet."

How extraordinary. Dr. Jack Wheeler, "intelligence expert," has figured out why there have been no terrorist attacks in the United States since 9/11: Because the Bush Administration has threatened to nuke the Muslim holy city of Mecca.

"Completely obliterating the terrorists' holiest of holies, rendering what is for them the world's most sacred spot a radioactive hole in the ground is retribution of biblical proportions – and those are the only proportions that will do the job.

Osama would have laughed off such a threat, given his view that Americans are wussies who cut and run after a few losses, such as Lebanon in 1983 and Somalia in 1993. Part of Bush's rationale for invading Afghanistan and Iraq – obviously never expressed publicly – was to convince Osama that his threat to nuke Mecca was real. Osama hates America just as much as ever, but he is laughing no more.

Wheeler says bin Laden is "playing poker with a Texas cowboy holding the nuclear aces," so there's nothing al-Qaida could do that could come remotely close to risking obliterating Mecca.
Writes Wheeler: "So far, Osama has decided not to see if GW is bluffing. Smart move."

All I can say is "wow." Or, perhaps, "WOW!"

Dr. Jack Wheeler, "intelligence expert," has revealed the Administration's perfect plan to terrorize the terrorists by threatening to nuke Saudi Arabia.

It's brilliant in its dim-witted, wide-eyed simplicity -- awesome in its sophomoric, inane logic. This is no wussie War on Terror we're waging. No.

This is America's Terrible Holy Nuclear War on Terror: Watch out Mecca, move over Medina! If Bin Laden makes one false move, you and millions of innocent people are charred, extra crispy nuclear toast -- even if he's not there! Hell, we don't know where he is, but we sure do know where you are! Yee-hah! Perfect plan!

Why hasn't anyone spoken up about this before, one wonders? Obviously, because no one else is as smart as Dr. Jack Wheeler, "intelligence expert." I'm certain that the good doctor will explain to everyone how this perfect plan, like the Bush Administration's other perfect plans (e.g., Iraq, Afghanistan), will work itself out in the end. I'm almost giddy with anticipation.